It's time to STOP the fat shaming!

I am going to own this up front- I was privileged and continue to be, when the topic of food and groceries is talked about. I grew up in a house where I never questioned when or where my next meal was going to come from. And I am currently in a position to purchase groceries on a weekly basis without fear. I 100% own that privilege. And by doing so, I also recognize, not everyone was or is in the situation.

There are many people who don’t think about the relationship with their food. I certainly never did as a kid or even as a young adult. The more I started to work in the health and wellness industry, the more I learned about others and their relationship to food. This was a little nudge for me to take a closer look at my own.

Often behind closed doors, what and how we eat are often associated with our emotions. For some, when under extreme amounts of stress, they go one of two directions: all or none. And I know that I have gone each of those directions at different points in my life when under stress. And working in the industry I do, people are quick to judge when my weight fluctuations like anyone else. The number of comments I have received for both losing and gaining weight is too many to count. I would like help in understanding why someone I see in passing a few times a month feels it’s their right to make comments on my weight. If you have the answer, I’d love to have a chat….

I have had many conversations with friends and clients who have been shamed for being overweight or obese. And I have had friends and clients shamed for being too thin. It feels like society believes that it is still okay to shame people for their body shape.

In media, women are now being recognized as having confidence for “being comfortable in their own skin.” While men are still shamed for being lazy if they are overweight. Why is okay for one gender to be celebrated while the other is being shamed?

Fat Shaming, The Scarlet F.

I feel strongly about this subject right now because there are lots of memes posted on social media about what we might look like at the end of quarantine. Shaming people for their weight has serious long-term negative effects, both on individuals and society. The global community is on fire. And I understand that jokes will be made. I encourage you to think about the detriment those jokes can have on many people. After reaching out to Dr. Fatima Cody Stamford, an obesity medical physician, she had this to say about our situation with COVID-19:

“Covid 19 represents a very challenging time for us as it relates to managing our stress, dietary habits, physical activity, sleep, and many other factors. As such, there may be shifts in weight with the myriad of shifts associated with shelter in place directives as key lifestyle factors have been disrupted from what we have adapted in our normal daily life. However, this does not need to be a definitive sentence for excess weight accumulation. We can Make strides to normalize the aforementioned issues as much as possible to help keep us steady in these troubling times.”

Shaming doesn’t always come from external sources. We need to be kind and gentle on ourselves. Yes, our relationship with food may change. Our body shape may change as well. That is okay. Brené Brown, a leading researcher on vulnerability and shame has many great resources. Here is the link to her TED Talk titled Listening to Shame.

Finding empathy for others and ourselves is the key to getting rid of shame.

be well-